3/23/2013 11:24:00 PM

Ok, this is maybe the craziest, the most bizarre post that I have ever written on my blog. But I have to write it in here just so you know that I wasn’t joking yesterday. Some of you won't believe my story because it may feels like a fake story with too much coating (my friends were also not believing me. They thought my blackberry, whatsapp and twitter were being hacked!) but this is absolutely a 100% true story that me and my family would never forget. And beware, there’re a lot of swearing in this post.

Yesterday was an ordinary day. I woke up at 6 a.m, then going to college, pressing some fuck'n nails on a board (if you're a designer, you know what I mean), having lunch with my best friends, then going back to college again, and after the school businesses were over, I went to my favorite cinema to watch Argo, my former most anticipated movie this year and just won Best Picture at the Oscar last month. 

That was absolutely going to be a great TGIF--Thanks God It’s Friday--moment which I’ve been waiting on every week. Friday is the day when a new great movie (not always great, though) always showing up in theaters. So yes, watching movie on Friday is just a great way to end my hectic week (I don't have any classes on Saturday), to end it with a bang! But yesterday was a different story. Yesterday, Friday 22nd of March, was the day which I never wish to happen again in my life : 

I almost died in cinema.

Yes, you read it right. 

I almost fuck’n died in cinema! (No pun intended)

While typing this, I just remembered some films that based on a very bizarre true story, such as the recent Searching for Sugar Man, an Oscar-winning documentary film about the unknown, but also one of the greatest rock star in the history of mankind. The storyline was so bizarre that almost looks like a fake crap, but it truly happened. So did mine.

It happened on the scene when Tony Mendez (Ben Affleck) was on the first meeting with some CIA bosses and talking about how they could take the six U.S embassy staffs out from Iran. Then I suddenly really had a hard time to catch oxygen in the air. No, this is not a metaphor of how good the movie was. Shit really happened. 

Both of my hands went cold, numb, and a little bit shaking. But it gradually worsen. I couldn't feel my feet at the moment I decided to walk out from theater before the movie ended. That was my first time ever to have a walk out during a show, and ironically, it’s an Oscar winning picture. Oh I’m so sorry Ben :(

Argo fuck yourself!

There were some reasons why I decided to walk out at that moment, at that scariest-est-est shit that ever happened in my life :   

1. I wanted to live, obviously. It's programed in every normal human brain to stay alive.

2. I couldn't breath and that's really upsetting because : no more breath = dead = no more movies. 

3. I have watched Argo (HAHAHA).

4. And because of the most vital activity in human body : BREATHING, was about going to fail. And in a few minutes, if I wasn't doing anything, I would be the second person in the world to die in a cinema because of a respiratory failure (the first one died because he laughed too hard when he were watching 'A fish called Wanda'-1988).
But I think it's quite cool, you know : a cinephile who died at his favorite cinema. Oh my god, it's gonna be so great. Unfortunately, I can't read the news, enjoying my famousness, and answering some reporter's questions, just because I'm dead--not winning an Oscar.

Then, after walking like a zombie, I successfully reached my car and I was looking for my drinking bottle because suddenly, I became very very thirsty. But hell, there's only a little water left. So, the next mission was calling my mom (the only person who believed that I wasn't joking around) with a really pathetic voice (I was forgot how to make a proper sentence back then!) and going to Hypermart on the basement floor to buy some aqua and maybe looking for some help. Gladly, I know how to get there, fast. 

And here's what I thought on my way to parking lot and to the basement floor : 

1. Do I look like James Bond on Casino Royale, when he got poisoned and was going to die in a minute because of a heart attack? (It really came up to my mind. More on that later.)

2. Am I really going to die?
Because I really don't want to die. It's so freakin' scary, you know, when dead was clearly sitting next to you, and you weren't ready for it. It's 100000 times scarier than any japanese horror movies. 

3. I was asking some questions to myself, what have I done? What have I eaten? What happens to me? Am I having a heart attack? Why my heart feels so tight?

4. I was thinking, am I gonna live to watch Iron Man 3? It's quite bizarre, though, because my most anticipated movie this year is Evil Dead. Or maybe it contained EVIL and DEAD so my brain prevented it to come up to my mind?

5. If I die, what would happen next? What would my family thinking? Where would I be? Heaven? Hell? Or... Nowhere?

6. I didn't get any premonitions, or any feeling that I'm going to die. How could this happened?

Ok. That may sounds like some poor unfunny jokes, but that's actually coming up to my mind. When you're dying, you're gonna have a lot of shit and silly things going on your mind. Note that.

I finally reached the basement floor in maybe two or three minutes. But my condition was worsen than ever. Breathing became harder and harder until I thought I needed more than two holes on my nose. My fingers couldn't be moved at all, stiff, and it felt so stone cold. It just stayed like Voldemort's hand on Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix teaser poster (I don't know how to describe it). My whole chest felt very tight--I thought it was about going to explode. My heart was beating very very fast (but no pain, so it wasn't a heart attack). I felt “pins & needles” (kesemutan) on my whole body--and also numbness on some part. I couldn't see clearly, there're a lot of stars blocking my vision. I was very panic and afraid because I was on my own. I was alone. I was dying alone.

Then, there were some flashbacks coming to my mind about my former chemistry teacher who died recently, me with my high school best friends, me with my mom celebrating her birthday last week, Iron Man 3 poster, some people that I hate so much, my movie script, candles, and then imagining my black and white high school portrait in front of my brown coffin. 

It happened so fast, like 3-4 seconds, before the infamous heart attack scene from Casino Royale coming to my mind and how Bond survived from it (I still don't know how the fuck I could think about it). Unfortunately, there wasn't any “fancy toys” in my car to help myself, so I decided to get out and going to the nearest pharmacy available, rather than Hypermart : GUARDIAN (amazing name, huh?). Well, I did it just because I didn't want to die even I knew I wasn't strong enough to walk, and because there're still a lot of great things in my life worth living for : family, friends, my dreams, my career, and 1001 great movies to watch before I die. 

Ok, maybe there are some better ways for me to do to stay alive, and I was really thinking to do it back then, but did not, here’s why : 

1. Calling ambulance.

Yes, it was my first decision and always tried to do it. But, I didn't know what the number is (911 is for American citizen) and I couldn't talk much back then because talking needs air--you know, some operators are jerks. So, the only proper way was using your last breath to call someone who weren't dying and trusted you 100% : family. Oh yeah, and for those who really love to HACK your friends' Blackberry, PLEASE STOP IT FOR CHRIST'S SAKE. Because I posted it on Blackberry Messenger, twitter, etc and everybody were replying like my account was hacked or I was joking around in a very unfunny way. The others were asking me to do google search. Dying people don't do google search, especially when they couldn't even move their fingers. 
Or maybe they’re just hating me so much and glad that I was dying? :(

2. Waiting for ambulance if you really had succeeded calling them. 

I've watched a lot of movies, read news, well, they didn't make it, especially streets in Surabaya are very crowded at 5:30 PM.

3. Screaming for help or ring your car's horn loudly. 

Seriously, how many security staffs in Malls who really know how to help people? No offense, but it was pathetically useless, embarrassing, and wasting time.

4. Calling doctor.

Here’s the scenario : the nurse picks it up and ask me to wait. Then the doctor answers me, but there is no more sound because it’s too late. Then he decides that it is just a prank call. 

5. Just praying.

Yes I obviously did pray, but without 'just'. I’m not that kind of guy.

So, as soon as I got there (Guardian), I knew that I have to keep my body warm to stay alive for a while (big thanks to Titanic ending). I bought a bottle of Eucalyptus Oil also known as "Minyak Kayu Putih” (it cost IDR. 40.000! The price shocked me a little bit) and asked the staff to open it for me because I may died trying to open it (I couldn't move my fingers, remember?). Then I started to rub it onto my whole, reachable, body : neck, hands, arms, chest, stomach, back, head. Then I grabbed Aqua Drinking Water and drank it, just like Bond did, because I felt very dehydrated. And you know what, the people around me, except some of the Guardians staffs, were so fuck'n ignorant, or maybe they just didn't want to be involved. 

My body was getting slightly better. I could think clearer even I still had a hard time to take a breath properly and my chest was still going to explode. I asked the staff if there was any doctor in Guardian (you know, pharmacist or something). They said : the doctor had a day out. Holy fuck. And surprisingly, they also didn't know how to call an ambulance--or maybe they're just too afraid that their boss would get angry if there was something going on at his store. Gladly, they still permitted me to sit there and told me that I didn't have a heart attack.

So I decided to help myself for a while and won't asked any of my friends. Disappointed = angry = heart beating faster = more oxygen! But I tried to contact my family via Blackberry Messenger, and you what happened? 


I thought death really wanted me so bad. 

Glad I still have a “backup” phone with no hangs and errors, so I tried googling about heart attack, ambulance telephone number, etc. I have to make sure that it wasn't a heart attack. Of course it wasn't. Then I tried to call Ramsay Hospital and Siloam Hospital (thanks to google and foursquare) but the operators were too busy and never picking up my call. 

Then I tried to contact one of my close friend who are using whatsapp. He is a medical student. I can’t remember what I've asked him about, but as good as I remember, his answers were not really helpful until I became very mad and deleted the app, LOL. But still, I have to say a very big thanks to you, dude, for your fast replies.

Minutes have passed. My condition wasn’t going any better. I was still very panic and afraid. All I could and wanted to do at that very moment was looking for what’s really going on with my body. But I didn’t know what medicine should I drank, who should I called again, and what should I type on google. I was really that panic! Then I gave up and just trying to keep my body warm with Eucalyptus Oil and thinking of something nice (thanks The Impossible-2012). 

My mom finally came--I didn't know what time was it--and surprisingly, she also came with my aunt and uncle. I couldn’t hold my tears of joy. I wasn’t crying, though, I was just happy. My mom looked very pale. She brought a medicine that I didn’t know and asked me to chew it. Without any further questions I chewed it. 

Seconds later, they helped me to get to my mom’s car and she asked me to give my car key to my aunt so she could put it to my home. 

FAST FORWARD >>>>>>>>>

We finally arrived at Ramsay Hospital. Thanks to the medicine, I was getting much better even my heart was still beating fast and I was very, very weak. Unfortunately, a lot of doctors over there have already been going home or fully booked. So my mom was looking for any doctors available. She didn't take me to UGD. 

We finally found a doctor and I told him my story. Then he asked me to do an ESG to check what’s really going on with my heart. And you know what, the heart was okay! 

After having a little confusing chit-chat, my mom decided to take me home rather than left me to spend a night at the hospital with an infusion sticking on my hand, just like the doctor recommended me to. The doctor told me that I didn’t have any problem with vital organ (especially heart) because I didn’t feel anything before the shit happened. Well, except my super high blood pressure which could be caused by that traumatic incident a few hours ago.

After that, we were finally going home. I did some normal things at home, like having a very late dinner, brushing my teeth, then changing my clothes. But when I finally on my bed, ready to go to sleep, I was crying out loud. You know, the moment when you finally realized that you were going to die and you survived from it. That was obviously the most traumatic, the scariest thing that ever happened in my life. 

9 hours later. I woke up at 10 morning today, and my body felt like nothing had ever happened to me, except some tiredness which is not a big deal. My blood pressure was coming back to normal--my mom has a tool to check it. I could breath normally (even it felt draggy sometimes). 

Well, I can’t wait for monday to find out what’s really going on with me.

Here’s the morale of my story* :
*whether you’re alone or not

1. Stop hacking your friends’ blackberry and telling some serious lies. What if it really happened and nobody trusted you or your friends? You’re doomed!

2. Don’t trust anybody even your friends in a death-or-alive matter, except your friends are staying with you (no pun intended) when it happens.

3. Watch a lot of movies, and try not to do the stupid things that the characters did.

4. Use your final minutes (you never know whether it’s really a final or not) to call your parents and said everything you need. I refused to tell my mom that I love her because it’s gonna be upsetting her (she watches Korean Drama everyday) and it’s so freak’n cliche.

5. Always have emergency numbers on your phone. 

6. Don’t use blackberry. Go buy an iPhone or Samsung Galaxy.

7. Don’t cry until the proper moment. 

8. Don’t panic (but it’s very hard to do).

9. Don’t ask for help via social media. That’s ultimately pointless, slow and embarrassing. Fuck you reporters and newspapers.

10. Don’t call nine-one-one. It’s for American Citizen.

11. Use your fuck’n brain and instinct.

12. Do not ever go to the cinema alone. Ups.

13. Do not ever wish to die. You have no idea how scary it is when you’re dying. 

14. Think of something nice.

Ok. That’s all folks. 
Thanks for reading. ;)

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  1. Kata dokternya ente kena sakit apa sih bero, serem amat penyakitnya

  2. So sorry to hear for what happened to you, bro.

    What's the doctor diagnose result of your illness like that? If anything like this happens again, you might try coughing forcefully for suppressing your heart to circulate blood. And if you can breathe, breathe deeply every 2 minutes and coughing in full force.

  3. eh eh kok semalem aku jg kena serangan aneh pas nonton argo lhoh. ga tau krna terlalu semangat nonton ato karna kebanyakan makan popcorn yak, tiba2 aja ky sesak napas gitu, trus aku batuk2in aja biar banyak o2 masuk

  4. I'm so sorry to hear this. It definitely is a super scary thing. R u going to post what the doctor said about this by any chance? Hope you're getting much better now :)

  5. Walah, jangan" ini nih yang sering dibilang sama emak gw --> Angin Duduk (alias Angina Pectoris (hasil googling))
    Soalnya dulu tante saya pernah kena gejala yang mirip sama agan ceritain, dan untungnya sama-sama selamet...-_-

  6. i'm sorry to hear what happened to you.
    but by the way, i love the sixth moral of ur story.
    just dont use that stupid blcakberry smartphone.
    they just being PENDING or giving you the spinning clock all the time..

  7. but.....where's Argo movie review???? just kiddin' bro :-). glad u can make it, so we can keep stalking ur blog to read movies review in future....btw can u tell us what medicine ur mom gave to u?

  8. Halo, aku rasa kamu bukan ngalamin angina pectoris atau sakit jantung lainnya,dari yg aku baca sih, kemungkinan besar yg kamu alami itu adalah serangan panik. Jadi serangan panik itu datang tanpa sebab, dimana saja, bahkan tanpa pemicu yg menyebabkan jantung berdebar, keringat dingin, dan perasaan seperti akan mati. Banyak orang yg pernah ngalamin ini, kalo sudah terlalu sering dan mengganggu, biasanya obatnya adalah obat penenang. Mudah2an membantu. Anyway, i'm a doctor :)


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