ARGO AND THE STORY OF A GUY WHO (ALMOST) DIED IN CINEMA3/23/2013 11:24:00 PM
Ok, this is maybe the craziest, the most bizarre post that I have ever written on my blog. But I have to write it in here just so you know that I wasn’t joking yesterday. Some of you won't believe my story because it may feels like a fake story with too much coating (my friends were also not believing me. They thought my blackberry, whatsapp and twitter were being hacked!) but this is absolutely a 100% true story that me and my family would never forget. And beware, there’re a lot of swearing in this post.
Yesterday was an ordinary day. I woke up at 6 a.m, then going to college, pressing some fuck'n nails on a board (if you're a designer, you know what I mean), having lunch with my best friends, then going back to college again, and after the school businesses were over, I went to my favorite cinema to watch Argo, my former most anticipated movie this year and just won Best Picture at the Oscar last month.
There were some reasons why I decided to walk out at that moment, at that scariest-est-est shit that ever happened in my life :
2. I couldn't breath and that's really upsetting because : no more breath = dead = no more movies.
3. I have watched Argo (HAHAHA).
4. And because of the most vital activity in human body : BREATHING, was about going to fail. And in a few minutes, if I wasn't doing anything, I would be the second person in the world to die in a cinema because of a respiratory failure (the first one died because he laughed too hard when he were watching 'A fish called Wanda'-1988). But I think it's quite cool, you know : a cinephile who died at his favorite cinema. Oh my god, it's gonna be so great. Unfortunately, I can't read the news, enjoying my famousness, and answering some reporter's questions, just because I'm dead--not winning an Oscar.
2. Am I really going to die?
Because I really don't want to die. It's so freakin' scary, you know, when dead was clearly sitting next to you, and you weren't ready for it. It's 100000 times scarier than any japanese horror movies.
I finally reached the basement floor in maybe two or three minutes. But my condition was worsen than ever. Breathing became harder and harder until I thought I needed more than two holes on my nose. My fingers couldn't be moved at all, stiff, and it felt so stone cold. It just stayed like Voldemort's hand on Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix teaser poster (I don't know how to describe it). My whole chest felt very tight--I thought it was about going to explode. My heart was beating very very fast (but no pain, so it wasn't a heart attack). I felt “pins & needles” (kesemutan) on my whole body--and also numbness on some part. I couldn't see clearly, there're a lot of stars blocking my vision. I was very panic and afraid because I was on my own. I was alone. I was dying alone.
Or maybe they’re just hating me so much and glad that I was dying? :(
Seriously, how many security staffs in Malls who really know how to help people? No offense, but it was pathetically useless, embarrassing, and wasting time.
Here’s the scenario : the nurse picks it up and ask me to wait. Then the doctor answers me, but there is no more sound because it’s too late. Then he decides that it is just a prank call.
Yes I obviously did pray, but without 'just'. I’m not that kind of guy.
PENDING with THE SPINNING CLOCK.
I thought death really wanted me so bad.
After having a little confusing chit-chat, my mom decided to take me home rather than left me to spend a night at the hospital with an infusion sticking on my hand, just like the doctor recommended me to. The doctor told me that I didn’t have any problem with vital organ (especially heart) because I didn’t feel anything before the shit happened. Well, except my super high blood pressure which could be caused by that traumatic incident a few hours ago.
*whether you’re alone or not
2. Don’t trust anybody even your friends in a death-or-alive matter, except your friends are staying with you (no pun intended) when it happens.
3. Watch a lot of movies, and try not to do the stupid things that the characters did.
4. Use your final minutes (you never know whether it’s really a final or not) to call your parents and said everything you need. I refused to tell my mom that I love her because it’s gonna be upsetting her (she watches Korean Drama everyday) and it’s so freak’n cliche.
5. Always have emergency numbers on your phone.
6. Don’t use blackberry. Go buy an iPhone or Samsung Galaxy.
7. Don’t cry until the proper moment.
8. Don’t panic (but it’s very hard to do).
9. Don’t ask for help via social media. That’s ultimately pointless, slow and embarrassing. Fuck you reporters and newspapers.
10. Don’t call nine-one-one. It’s for American Citizen.
11. Use your fuck’n brain and instinct.
12. Do not ever go to the cinema alone. Ups.
13. Do not ever wish to die. You have no idea how scary it is when you’re dying.
14. Think of something nice.
Ok. That’s all folks. Thanks for reading. ;)